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Physically, I wanted, craved and needed affection and sex as much if not more than anything in my life. And sadly, was not getting it.After putting up with this for awhile, I finally stepped out a couple of times. But in both instances, the risk, the drama, and the problems that went along with the affairs just made me realize that with kids, family, and a pretty easygoing lifestyle, it wasn't worth it. So I accepted the fact I needed to take care of it on my own, and became very interested in late night chat rooms, dirty discussions, porn and a lot of masturbation. I enjoyed it immensely, and it became a daily (and sometimes more than once a day) event for me. Almost at some points and obsession with having orgasms. I would often times wait until my wife and kids were sleeping, I'd get on the computer, and I'd take to the videos, online chats, and the webcam sites. I'd find myself getting off one or two times every night, and sometimes letting complete strangers watch me orgasm. I. Like we haven’t talked about keeping him in the states regardless but I wanted him in my life forever after meeting him. He said yes to the proposal. I bought the rings, had them delivered from Spain & took a selfie with them. I was his #MCM the Monday before I came to visit. I started writing my vows after that, he started writing his vows after that. We had a hell of a week, of ups & downs separately but forever kept our eyes on the prize. Because when we finally saw each other again, it was like falling into a liquid mirror; his hug was so mighty I felt at home. We began to build more to it, on a difficultly hilarious ride to his abode. Talking about feelings, the move, explaining other trivial things of the week, warning me of what’s around East Haddam, holding each other’s hands, massaging the back of each other’s heads, kissing at red lights, making him pull over to actually make out & getting to know each other again.It’s enormous how strangers from two different lives have.
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